Sunday, October 30, 2011

Last year on this date, I was at my grandmother's funeral. My dad sang "In The Garden." He struggled to even make it to the funeral. How he had the strength to get up and sing, I have no idea. But he did it.

At one point during the service, my dad was holding my right hand, and LDR was holding my left. And I wished that it could just stay like that. But I knew it could. He was dying right in front of my eyes.

I know this all went down a year ago, but some days it feels like it just happened. Does that ever go away? I guess that's a rhetorical question. Nobody can tell you how your own grief is going to play out for the rest of your life. I'm really just rambling...but it's my blog, so that's what it's here for. :)

I wondered how I would feel a year after the fact. Like my favorite yoga teacher often instructs me, I'm just going to observe my feelings and I won't judge them. They are what they are.

2 comments:

Mel's Blog said...

Sending you some hugs today. I do understand your feelings that it seemed like it just happened, that it doesn't feel like a year has gone by.

{{{hugs}}}

affectionforfitness said...

My Dad died many years ago, but I remember it being hard for more than 1 year. But on the second year, I quit crying after going by cemeteries. And it did just get easier after that.

Your sorrow shows what a good person you are. A superficial jerk would have already felt better.

:-) Marion