People always ask me why I'm not married yet. I get the, "you seem like a nice person...you have your life together, etc" speech. I just nod and and tell them I haven't met the right person, and leave it at that.
But I honestly don't know if I have the temperament. It would really take the right, patient person. I've been so used to making decisions on my own for so long. To actually have to stop and confer/defer/discuss with someone? That's just so far from my nature.
This whole thought process was triggered by a conversation I had with one of the members of my bowling team. I don't live in their house, so I can't say for sure, but it seems like she can't jump unless her hubby tells her how high. 2 weeks ago, when we really did need everyone to be there bowling, her husband got called out on a work assignment. She did not show up either. OK, your husband had to work, YOU didn't. I fail to understand why you couldn't come, when you dang near live around the corner from the bowling alley, anyway? Tonight is our awards ceremony, and then we're going to do a no-tap tournament afterwards. I emailed her and told her that tonight is the night to pick up the money. She called me and started telling me about how her husband's work schedule has been really unpredictable, so she just doesn't know...etc. The whole time I'm thinking...um, if somebody told me I could come and pick up some MONEY, I'd be right there to get it, with or without my husband! Hell, I'd pick up HIS money too! In the years I've known her, it's always been like this. I can see deferring to your hubby on major decisions, but EVERY. LITTLE. THING???
I've had claims where the wife is injured, and I call to check status with her and ask her how SHE'S doing, and she just hands the phone to her husband. Um, you're the one with the broke wrist, not him! Why do I need to talk to him? I just can't see me being this person in a relationship. But I have run into some guys who have expected this.
I know that not all marriages are like this. I guess I'm just trying to work through the thought process on this. My brother and sisters have certainly provided some good examples of marriage. They are definitely not perfect, and have their ups and downs, but they keep striving to work together. I guess that's the part I just need to look forward to.