I was just reading on another blog, and the commenter said, "we all do not show love in the same way." Hmmmm. Yes, I guess this is true. Countless things can affect the way you show your love and affection for one another. Your background, when/where/how you grew up, and the people that you've met in this lifetime.
Me personally? I'm a "hugger." If I can give and receive a hug, that's the best. Some of the best moments with LDR are when he just hugs me and holds me. We don't talk or anything. We just hold on to each other. Or my sister...the one who retired from the military. She squeezes the LIVING BREATH out of me every time she hugs me. Like, I probably need a CT scan for cracked ribs, but I wouldn't have it any other way! In my family, we don't get off the phone with each other without saying "I love you." I know some people just aren't that vocal. I'm actually trying to think back to how many times my ex actually said that he loved me, and it wasn't in an email.. :::crickets chirping:::
Annnnnnywho (lol), I think part of showing people love is knowing what they like and HOW they like to be shown love/appreciated. Which I guess really only works if they reciprocate. For instance, I have a friend who just does not like to hug people. It's just not her thing. We would be at get togethers and people would try to hug her and then they'd remember, oh yeah, Y doesn't hug folks. I haven't seen her in quite a few months, but the last time I did she actually hugged me! I was like, "huh?" and it must have shown on my face, because she said, "I'm trying to do better with this." But I think she was ok with hugging me because I never tried to force her to hug me. Once she told me she didn't "do" hugging (lol), then I respected that. Others would be like, "well girl you need to get over that, I'ma hug you anyway." Um...no. That's not the way to approach that. Not if you want those same people to respect how YOU feel!
I think that people just want you to KNOW them. Know what's important to them and then act accordingly. People get tired of giving and getting nothing in return. So maybe what they're expecting is not what YOU would do. So what! If you LOVE them, then sometimes you suck it up and you give them what THEY need. Especially if they'd do the same for you.
As Tamar Braxton would say, "point blank period." :)
Monday, May 9, 2011
Thursday, May 5, 2011
Yoga Off the Mat: Flexibility
This week's yoga principle is flexibility.
According to Merriam-Webster, definiteion #3 of flexible is the following: "characterized by a ready capability to adapt to new, different, or changing requirements (a flexible foreign policy) (a flexible schedule)"
I was sleepy on Wednesday morning and a bit out of sorts. I really should have blogged this that day, so I'd remember more. Oops. LOL!
The first thing that came to my mind when Stacy mentioned flexibility was the physical act of being flexible. I mean, we're sitting on yoga mats and she's about to take us into a 1 hour routine that will most definitely require flexibility (don't even get me going on the crow push ups - whole 'nother post all together). Right?
But really, it was about you being flexible with what the world throws at you. If you're on the mat that day, and a pose just isn't coming to you, or you can't get it quite right, how do you react? Do you get frustrated with yourself and lose concentration for the rest of the class? Or do you continue to go with the flow (literally) and just do what you can?
The same applies in life. I like schedules and plans. And checklists. I get excited when I can check something off of a list. I feel like I've gotten something done. When I set a schedule/plan, that's what I want to go by. I get flustered if you (or life) come along changing the plan. In the past, I would let that throw my entire day off. I'd carry the pissivity (yeah, probably not a word but it is for the purpose of this blog, lol) into the rest of the day. At 4:00pm, still mad about what I didn't get to do at 9:00am and how it threw off my entire day. So that leads to stress and anxiety, and none of those are good for my health. See how that sucks?
I told Stacy about my initial thoughts in regard to flexibility...how I wasn't ready for all those push ups she had us doing in class - isn't that strength? What's that got to do with flexibility? I've been hoodwinked and bamboozled. Plymouth Rock landed on ME, man.
Her response: "I clearly stated that flexibility and strength are not mutually exclusive."
Oh. LOL! (well yeah, she probably didsay that, but it was 5:35am. Cut me some slack!)
There is strength in being flexible. We shouldn't feel like we're being weak or being defeated if we have to veer from the plan. It's ok. That's life! Duly noted.
So, take this lesson out into the world, my fellow yogis, yoginis and aspiring yogis and yoginis. Be flexible!
According to Merriam-Webster, definiteion #3 of flexible is the following: "characterized by a ready capability to adapt to new, different, or changing requirements (a flexible foreign policy) (a flexible schedule)"
I was sleepy on Wednesday morning and a bit out of sorts. I really should have blogged this that day, so I'd remember more. Oops. LOL!
The first thing that came to my mind when Stacy mentioned flexibility was the physical act of being flexible. I mean, we're sitting on yoga mats and she's about to take us into a 1 hour routine that will most definitely require flexibility (don't even get me going on the crow push ups - whole 'nother post all together). Right?
But really, it was about you being flexible with what the world throws at you. If you're on the mat that day, and a pose just isn't coming to you, or you can't get it quite right, how do you react? Do you get frustrated with yourself and lose concentration for the rest of the class? Or do you continue to go with the flow (literally) and just do what you can?
The same applies in life. I like schedules and plans. And checklists. I get excited when I can check something off of a list. I feel like I've gotten something done. When I set a schedule/plan, that's what I want to go by. I get flustered if you (or life) come along changing the plan. In the past, I would let that throw my entire day off. I'd carry the pissivity (yeah, probably not a word but it is for the purpose of this blog, lol) into the rest of the day. At 4:00pm, still mad about what I didn't get to do at 9:00am and how it threw off my entire day. So that leads to stress and anxiety, and none of those are good for my health. See how that sucks?
I told Stacy about my initial thoughts in regard to flexibility...how I wasn't ready for all those push ups she had us doing in class - isn't that strength? What's that got to do with flexibility? I've been hoodwinked and bamboozled. Plymouth Rock landed on ME, man.
Her response: "I clearly stated that flexibility and strength are not mutually exclusive."
Oh. LOL! (well yeah, she probably didsay that, but it was 5:35am. Cut me some slack!)
There is strength in being flexible. We shouldn't feel like we're being weak or being defeated if we have to veer from the plan. It's ok. That's life! Duly noted.
So, take this lesson out into the world, my fellow yogis, yoginis and aspiring yogis and yoginis. Be flexible!
Fashion Find
I found this at Cato for $15.99 - you can't beat that, man!
I wore it with a white tank top, indigo colored crop pants, and some pewter colored shoes.
What are your latest finds?
I wore it with a white tank top, indigo colored crop pants, and some pewter colored shoes.
What are your latest finds?
Tuesday, April 26, 2011
Curvy Girl Yoga
I've made a few posts about the meditative and spiritual aspects of yoga, but what about the physical? Well Stacy is definitely helping me to develop my muscles. I got some triceps coming in! Here are some photos:
High crescent lunge: When I started yoga, I couldn't do this move with the right foot back, because I had broken my toe shortly after starting my yoga practice. So glad I can do it now! The alternative is a low crescent lunge where the knee comes to the mat.
Half moon: some days, this is just not a good one for me. I usually have to use a block under the hand at the bottom. I'm surprised I was able to hold this long enough for the picture. LOL! I probably fell out like a ninja right after the flash went off.
Down dog: this is a pose a lot of people are familiar with. When you first start doing yoga this may seem like a pose that takes a lot of work, but after a while you'll come to appreciate it as a resting pose. :)
Dancer: In this pose, you start out with the leg bent and the opposite arm up in the air. You reach back and grab your ankle, and then slowly bend forward. You really have to find a focus point so that you don't fall over.
Crow/Crane: This is one of my favorite poses. I think because I can vividly remember crashing and burning the first time I tried it. I was up for all of one second - if that. Then bam! Hit the mat. LOL! Sometimes after holding this for 5 breaths, we will kick out into a high push up. That took me a minute to learn as well. I had the bruised knee to prove it. :)
Tripod: I have an easier time going into this pose from crow...but I'm sure there are folks who can just get right into it with no issue. The next step from here is to try to use my abs to get my legs up into the air for a headstand. I've tried...I can get them up, but then I roll right over like a weeble-wobble. FAIL! LOL!
Chair pose, with an extra kick: up on the toes! Always have to keep it interesting!
Bow: not my favorite...it's hard for me to keep my knees in close, and I can't lift very high, but it's a work in progress!
Canoe pose: It works the abs. We lower our torso and legs and hold, then bring them back up and hold. Rinse, repeat. Whoo!
Crescent twist: after getting into the aforementioned crescent lunge, we may hold for one or two breaths before twisting and holding.
Warrior 3 aka Airplane: We were trying to do this in class the other day, but instead of prayer hands, we had our hands out to the side...like the wings of an airplane. Then we were supposed to move our arms down/together, and then back up. I couldn't hold my balance and was apparently flailing everywhere...which sent my classmate Kiesha into a fit of laughter...gotta love 5:30am yoga!
Triangle: This is actually a triangle with a twist. If this were a regular triangle I would have had my left hand on my left shin, and my right arm straight up in the air (I'd have been facing the camera). Twists are good for the spine, so I don't mind doing them.
Toe hold: Some days, I have to use a strap for this. Especially after I've already been in class for 20 -30 minutes working. It's something else to try and muster balance that early in the morning. LOL!
Three point: We will usually go into this and then bring our leg down and through to the top of the mat, to get into a warrior pose. For some reason, I didn't taken any Warrior 1/Warrior 2 poses.
Wheel: Sometimes we used to do this in high school, as part of track practice. I never knew it was a yoga move. Go figure! And lemme tell you, it was much easier at age 18. LOL! The first time I tried this with Stacy, it was all I could do just to lift myself up. Now, I can get up there pretty easily, so we may hold for 5-10 breaths.
Supported wheel: When coming into wheel, we push up and first rest on the crown of our heads. But if you're comfy there, you can stay there by bringing the hands behind the head and clasping them, and bringing the elbows in. The idea is to rest on your forearms, not your head. This also took some getting use to, but I'm much better at it now. Especially when my mat cooperates and my feet aren't sliding!
Supported wheel with leg up: This one here? I thought Stacy was CRAZY when she introduced this. I was just trying to get used to being in wheel, and now she's talking about bringing a leg up? What?!? It really requires focus and a mind-body connection. In the beginning, my mind was telling my leg to go up, but my leg surely was NOT listening. I could get my knee up for a few seconds, and then right back down. I can't tell you how happy I am that (on a good day) I can get my leg up there. Whoo hoo!
Happy Baby: This is one of several inversion poses - feet are up above the heart. We always come into an inversion at the end of class, before going into savasana. I usually chose this one.
So, that's what I've been doing! We don't do every pose in every class. It depends on what we're focusing on for that week. I am really loving yoga. I love learning new things, and challenging my body to do new things. I especially love that I'm achieving it at THIS size. Curvy girls most definitely CAN do yoga!
High crescent lunge: When I started yoga, I couldn't do this move with the right foot back, because I had broken my toe shortly after starting my yoga practice. So glad I can do it now! The alternative is a low crescent lunge where the knee comes to the mat.
Half moon: some days, this is just not a good one for me. I usually have to use a block under the hand at the bottom. I'm surprised I was able to hold this long enough for the picture. LOL! I probably fell out like a ninja right after the flash went off.
Down dog: this is a pose a lot of people are familiar with. When you first start doing yoga this may seem like a pose that takes a lot of work, but after a while you'll come to appreciate it as a resting pose. :)
Dancer: In this pose, you start out with the leg bent and the opposite arm up in the air. You reach back and grab your ankle, and then slowly bend forward. You really have to find a focus point so that you don't fall over.
Crow/Crane: This is one of my favorite poses. I think because I can vividly remember crashing and burning the first time I tried it. I was up for all of one second - if that. Then bam! Hit the mat. LOL! Sometimes after holding this for 5 breaths, we will kick out into a high push up. That took me a minute to learn as well. I had the bruised knee to prove it. :)
Tripod: I have an easier time going into this pose from crow...but I'm sure there are folks who can just get right into it with no issue. The next step from here is to try to use my abs to get my legs up into the air for a headstand. I've tried...I can get them up, but then I roll right over like a weeble-wobble. FAIL! LOL!
Chair pose, with an extra kick: up on the toes! Always have to keep it interesting!
Bow: not my favorite...it's hard for me to keep my knees in close, and I can't lift very high, but it's a work in progress!
Canoe pose: It works the abs. We lower our torso and legs and hold, then bring them back up and hold. Rinse, repeat. Whoo!
Crescent twist: after getting into the aforementioned crescent lunge, we may hold for one or two breaths before twisting and holding.
Warrior 3 aka Airplane: We were trying to do this in class the other day, but instead of prayer hands, we had our hands out to the side...like the wings of an airplane. Then we were supposed to move our arms down/together, and then back up. I couldn't hold my balance and was apparently flailing everywhere...which sent my classmate Kiesha into a fit of laughter...gotta love 5:30am yoga!
Triangle: This is actually a triangle with a twist. If this were a regular triangle I would have had my left hand on my left shin, and my right arm straight up in the air (I'd have been facing the camera). Twists are good for the spine, so I don't mind doing them.
Toe hold: Some days, I have to use a strap for this. Especially after I've already been in class for 20 -30 minutes working. It's something else to try and muster balance that early in the morning. LOL!
Three point: We will usually go into this and then bring our leg down and through to the top of the mat, to get into a warrior pose. For some reason, I didn't taken any Warrior 1/Warrior 2 poses.
Wheel: Sometimes we used to do this in high school, as part of track practice. I never knew it was a yoga move. Go figure! And lemme tell you, it was much easier at age 18. LOL! The first time I tried this with Stacy, it was all I could do just to lift myself up. Now, I can get up there pretty easily, so we may hold for 5-10 breaths.
Supported wheel: When coming into wheel, we push up and first rest on the crown of our heads. But if you're comfy there, you can stay there by bringing the hands behind the head and clasping them, and bringing the elbows in. The idea is to rest on your forearms, not your head. This also took some getting use to, but I'm much better at it now. Especially when my mat cooperates and my feet aren't sliding!
Supported wheel with leg up: This one here? I thought Stacy was CRAZY when she introduced this. I was just trying to get used to being in wheel, and now she's talking about bringing a leg up? What?!? It really requires focus and a mind-body connection. In the beginning, my mind was telling my leg to go up, but my leg surely was NOT listening. I could get my knee up for a few seconds, and then right back down. I can't tell you how happy I am that (on a good day) I can get my leg up there. Whoo hoo!
Happy Baby: This is one of several inversion poses - feet are up above the heart. We always come into an inversion at the end of class, before going into savasana. I usually chose this one.
So, that's what I've been doing! We don't do every pose in every class. It depends on what we're focusing on for that week. I am really loving yoga. I love learning new things, and challenging my body to do new things. I especially love that I'm achieving it at THIS size. Curvy girls most definitely CAN do yoga!
Thursday, April 14, 2011
Three Things Thursday
1. Yesterday, our claims system went down at work. From about 11:00am to 4:30pm, NOTHING got done. Zip! Except maybe answering calls to tell folks the system was down and we couldn't assist them. The blessings and curses of having everything on the computer. Today, the system came back up. I made sure to focus on getting things done today, and I'm happy to say I got caught up! :score:
2. It's great to be back with the journaling. I can't post everything on the innanets. LOL! I found an app for the iPad called My Journal. You can add photos to the entries, little sticky notes, etc. Only thing I don't like is that you only get one page per day. I won't complain too much, 'cause it's a free app, but I wish they'd change that. I plan to do my journaling on there for now, including the gratitude entries. I'll figure out how to work within the scope, until I find another app I like better.
3. The other day I was lamenting about how I felt like my workout completely SUCKED. I was talking to LDR over the phone. He said, "babe...everything you've been through in the last 6 months...the workout was NOT horrible. It was great." It's always nice to have someone to grab you by the shoulders and shake some sense into you, verbally. Love that man!
Wednesday, April 13, 2011
Loss
Loss. It's a part of life. No one is going to stay on this earth forever. We know it's going to happen, but we don't necessarily know when and how. When you experience that loss, it's like your life gets thrown into this chaotic state. If you're lucky, you come out the other side with a better appreciation for life itself, and a better appreciation for WHY we need to do better at being present and focusing on the good things.
Last night, I woke up out of a dead sleep at 3:00am. I was dreaming about my dad. He was laying in the bed, like he was in the hospital when I last saw him. He kept trying to talk to me, and I was the only one who noticed that he was trying to talk. But I couldn't understand what he was saying. For whatever reason I woke up scared.
Today, an online friend posted today that she lost her son yesterday. He took his own life. I don't know her personally, but when I found out it felt like somebody gut punched me. Brought back some memories of when a family member attempted to take his own life. Thankfully, he didn't succeed. I can only imagine the pain this woman is feeling; her son was only 18. I hope that she can recover.
I feel like the universe is trying to tell me something. I'm trying to listen and be mindful.
I hope that everyone who reads this is having a better day than my friend who lost her son.
Tuesday, April 12, 2011
Brothers
"Our brothers and sisters are there with us from the dawn of our personal stories to the inevitable dusk."~Susan Scarf Merrell
That's me, my dad, and my brothers - about 9 weeks into my life here in this world! My brothers were about 11 and 12. My dad would have been 34. That's crazy to me...at age 34 he had 5 kids and had been married for about 13 years!
Anywho, my brothers are coming to visit in May. I can't wait! There's something about having big brothers. It's definitely a different relationship than the one you have with big sisters...but you know your brothers have your back.
I was thinking the other day, whenever I finally DO get married, my dad won't be here to walk me down the aisle. But my brothers will be. I'll have one on each side, just like in this photo. I'll most certainly miss having my dad there, but the thought of having my brothers there makes me smile.
Do you have brothers? If so, are you close?
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